Category Archives: Horizon in Sight

Horizon in Sight

Chapter Twenty-two – Kelad

Dan’s door was kept locked night and day. Food was brought three time a day by a rotating staff of nervous-looking kyrie. They would unlock the door, edge inside, and then exit quickly, as if they were afraid Dan might attack them. Apparently his scene in the hall outside had not gone unnoticed.

Occasionally, Aviir, the kyrie whom Vydar had sent, would accompany the food, and stay to talk with Dan. After the first few days, Dan determined to ask her why his door was kept locked.

When he asked her, Aviir ran both hands over her hair, sweeping it away from her face. “It’s because you’re new,” she sighed. “You aren’t ready for everything which is out there. It’s far better if—”

“I am ready,” Dan interrupted. “I’ve been ready for awhile.” He rested his gloves on the table and leaned forward. “I don’t like being locked up, Aviir.”

Aviir looked at him out of tired eyes. “You aren’t ready,” she repeated. “Once the shock of where you are dies off, then you’ll be let out.”

“Shock?” Dan repeated, almost laughing. He sat back. “I’ve seen it all. I told you of SR.”

Aviir smiled weakly. “Your ‘SR’ is not like the real world, Dan.”

Dan crossed his metal gloves, feeling the plates flex and slide against each other. “It’s based on it though. How different can it really be? I’m over the ‘shock’, Aviir. Let me out.”

“You will be let out,” Aviir said, a slight edge to her voice. “Vydar has summoned thousands. We know when people are ready to be let out.”

For a moment they looked at each other.

“When can I see Vydar?” Dan asked, changing the topic.

“Vydar is busy,” Aviir said. Dan thought it sounded automatic.

“I need to go back, Aviir,” Dan said, leaning back in his chair slightly. “I can’t stay here.”

“You will go back when the war is over,” Aviir said. “You know this.”

“Because Vydar said so?” Dan asked, leaning forwards. “I don’t trust Vydar, Aviir. I need to convince him to send me back. And I need you to tell me how to do that.”

Aviir glared at him – something she rarely did. “Neither you nor I is going to convince Vydar of anything. You’ve been summoned. You’re staying. At the end of the war, you will be sent back.”

Dan was silent.

Avirr changed tack under his gaze. “Vydar needs you,” she said. “We all do. We can’t win this war without you.”

“I don’t care about Vydar’s war,” Dan said, the words harsher than he had expected. “I don’t care about Vydar, or this land, or it’s problems. They aren’t my problems.”

Aviir regarded him reproachfully.

“I’m leaving, Aviir,” Dan said. “Neither you nor your Vydar can stop me. And if he won’t help me, then maybe the other Valkyrie will.”

It was Aviir’s turn to laugh, in a wilted sort of way. “Why would they help you?” she asked. “Vydar’s the one who summoned you, and he’s been gracious enough to offer to send you back at the end of the war. What makes you think the other Valkyrie would be more generous than Vydar?”

“This isn’t generosity,” Dan said quietly. However, he didn’t go further. The last few times he had spoken ill of Vydar, Aviir had left. He still wanted to get more out of her. “What about other ways back?” he said.

“Other ways?” Aviir echoed. “There are no other ways. The Valkyrie are the only ones who can send you back.”

“No,” Dan said dismissively, ignoring Aviir’s look. “I was told there was no way out once before, and that was a lie. There’s always a way out.”

“There isn’t,” Aviir said, a trace of annoyance in her voice now. “Trust me, if there was, others would have found it by now.”

Dan glared at her. “Why are you hiding this from me?”

“What? I’m hiding nothing. There’s no other way back, Dan. Did you hear me? No other way.

Dan was silent, but continued to gaze at her. He didn’t believe her for a second.

After a moment, Aviir stood. “I’ll be back,” she said. “Maybe tomorrow you’ll listen to what I say.”

Dan let her leave. She exited the room, closed the door – perhaps a bit harder than usual – and Dan heard the lock slide into place.

“I doubt it,” he muttered to himself.

The news of Dan’s displeasure with Vydar must have spread, because nearly three weeks after he had been summoned, an unfamiliar kyrie entered his room. She introduced herself as Felda, and said she had heard of his feelings towards the Valkyrie.

Dan smelled a trap. “So?” he asked. “Why are you here?”

Dan was sitting at the table, and Felda stepped forward so that she was across from him. “I’m here,” she said, “to free you from Vydar. I’m here to help you escape him.”

Dan was curious now. “Why?” he asked.

Felda spoke in a rush, anger coloring her voice. “Because he’s a possessive Valkyrie of extremes.” She paused and composed herself. “Not many see him for who he is, but if you do, we would like you to join us.”

“I hardly know him,” Dan pointed out.

“You know enough,” Felda said. “You know he’s summoned you here with no regard to your own life. But there’s more you don’t know.”

Dan was silent, inviting her to go on.

“Vydar is possessive, incredibly possessive. He has to be in control over everything, and if he’s not… well there’s nothing he won’t do. That’s why we – me and my allies – are against him. He’s too extreme. If someone is in his way, he will do anything to get rid of them. He’s imprisoned people just because they stood up to him, and even executed those who wouldn’t keep quiet. He’s changed sides in this war twice, only because his allies wouldn’t do what he wanted. He’s even entertained the massacre of hundreds of prisoners of war, simply to make a point. He’s not worthy to be a Valkyrie.”

Dan knew enough to be cautious, but he agreed with what Felda was saying. He didn’t know much about Vydar, but what he did know matched up with how she described him.

“Our interests would be better served on our own,” Felda continued, “or under one who knows where to draw the line. I don’t think you want to be his slave. I think you want to get out, and I can help you.”

Dan was about to agree, and ask what Felda had in mind, when the door opened, and Aviir came in. Felda whirled around, and for a moment the two kyrie stared at each other.

“Guard!” Aviir called behind her shoulder. Neither she nor Felda moved.

“Trying to convert another?” Aviir asked, stepping into the room.

“Trying to show him the true colors of the reckless fool you serve,” Felda spat.

“He is neither reckless nor a fool,” Aviir said calmly. “And,” she added as a kyrie soldier appeared in the doorway, “you may now leave. I recall the captain of the guard banishing you from entering the Citadel quite clearly. Make sure she leaves,” she added to the guard. The guard nodded, grasped Felda under the arm, and escorted her out of the room. Aviir closed the door behind them.

“What did she tell you?” Aviir asked wearily, approaching the table.

Dan saw no harm in telling her. He had no way to know if Felda had spoken the truth; the least he could do was hear Aviir’s side of things. He told her everything Felda had told him, and then asked her if it was true.

“No,” Aviir said. “At least not all of it.”

Dan was surprised she hadn’t just denied it all. “What do you mean?” he asked.

“Well, you first have to understand where she’s coming from,” Aviir said. “Back when the war started, Felda’s parents were followers of a kyrie called Kelad. Kelad, like nearly everyone else at the time, wanted Vydar’s wellspring for himself. You remember how I told you Vydar started this war on the side of Utgar?”

Dan nodded. Aviir had told him several days ago.

“Well,” Aviir continued, “Kelad learned that both Einar and Vydar were intending to betray Utgar and join the alliance. I don’t know how he found out, because it was a well-guarded secret, but timing was critical. Both Vydar and Einar had soldiers mixed in with Utgar’s who needed to be extracted without raising suspicion. Kelad found out what they were planning, and realized he could blackmail Vydar into relinquishing the wellspring.”

“What happened?” Dan asked.

“Kelad knew he couldn’t just walk into Vydar’s audience chamber and tell him what he knew; Vydar would imprison him without a second thought. He needed some sort of leverage. So he decided to tell one other person what he had found out, with instructions that if anything happened to him, that he would then tell everyone, and the secret would get out. That way, silencing him would not solve the problem, meaning Vydar would have to listen to him. It was a good plan, and might have changed a lot in the war. Unfortunately for Kelad, he put his faith in the wrong person.

“He had entrusted the secret to a wounded samurai of Einar’s, called Takuya Imai. Takuya held no rank, was discharged from service because of his wound, and was generally unhappy with his lot in life. Kelad thought he would be perfect, as he was virtually invisible to all those around him. Takuya had other ideas.

“The instant Kelad told him what he knew, Takuya went straight to Einar and told him the whole story. Einar apprehended Kelad before he ever reached Vydar, and for his loyalty, Takuya was made the commander of a forward outpost. Kelad was turned over to Vydar, who had him executed for conspiracy and treason. Most of his followers were rounded up, but a few, like Felda, remain, skulking in the shadows, trying to stir up trouble for Vydar.”

Dan leaned back in his chair. “So you think I should ignore her then?” he asked. He wanted to see what Aviir’s reply would be.

Aviir took her time in answering. “No,” she finally said. “She was right: Vydar can be extreme at times, but he’s not as she paints him. There’s only one thing you have to understand about Vydar, and that is that keeping his people safe is the only thing he cares about. The only thing. Yes, he can be extreme, but you have to understand the reason why.”

Dan looked at her dubiously. “Extreme is still extreme,” he said.

Aviir sighed. “Do you know why he joined Utgar at the start of the war?” she asked.

Dan shook his head.

“Everyone expected him to join Jandar and Ullar. Ullar especially believed this. Ullar had been trying to claim Anund for years before the wellsprings were discovered, and now that he had a wellspring, the regional governors were bowing to his control one by one. Vydar saw Ullar’s rule as oppressive; Ullar treated Anund like a conquered territory, not part of his own land. So when Vydar found his wellspring and Ullar tried to take it, Vydar stopped him. He had the people of Anund behind him, but Ullar was far more powerful. So, to protect his people, Vydar did the only thing he could do: he called on Utgar for aid.

“Utgar gladly flooded Anund with marro, probably thinking that when it was all over, he would claim Vydar’s wellspring for himself. That never happened. The occupying marro began contaminating the rivers and lakes of Anund with their filth, and Vydar’s people grew sick from the contamination. When Utgar refused to remove the marro, Vydar turned again, this time with Einar, joined the alliance, and drove the marro from Anund by force. Ullar still wanted Anund as his own, but since Vydar now had an army of his own, Ullar had to respect his wishes.”

Aviir stood. “That’s why he’s extreme, Dan,” she said. “His people are threatened from all sides, and he’s vowed to do anything to keep them safe. He doesn’t care about land or glory or riches. He cares only about his people. In this war very few things are certain, so the fact that Vydar’s loyalty to Anund has never wavered, means something. It’s something we can hold onto. And in a war like this, people need something to hold onto.

“Believe Felda if you will. Some dislike the extremes Vydar goes to. But you can never say that he’s selfish. He’s probably the most selfless kyrie I’ve ever met.”

And with that, Aviir left the room, leaving Dan to evaluate her words for himself.

Dan still didn’t like Vydar, but if what Aviir had said was true, he at least understood where he was coming from. He knew he would do absolutely anything to get to Heleer, for example. That, at least, Dan could understand.  

Chapter Twenty-One – Gloves

Dan spent the next week in the same small room. Most of the time he was left to himself, and he spent many hours thinking about what NT9 had told him, and how he might get back to Heleer. While he didn’t like the sound of Vydar, the Valkyrie was obviously the first step. Dan would ask him to send him back. If he refused… well, he would have to find another way.

Occasionally, one of the bird-humans – or kyrie, as Dan was learning to call them – would visit him. Her name was Aviir, and Dan could only assume she had been sent to see if he was loyal to Vydar. He had told her he wasn’t the first time she had spoken to him, and he had spent the time since berating himself for the mistake. He doubted Vydar would listen to him now.

NT9 also visited him occasionally, and despite being a soulborg, Dan was beginning to believe he was an ally. One day he asked NT9 why he was different.

“I’m not Khyta Lekon,” he said. “Khyta Soulborg,” he added at Dan’s confused look. “I’m Senry Lekon. There are several different factions of soulborgs, and mine is different from the one which imprisoned you, if I’m correct.”

“I was imprisoned by these… Khyta Soulborgs?” Dan asked.

“Khyta are the only ones to use SR Units to imprison Mariedians, so I assume they are the ones, yes.”

“And you don’t?”

“No. Never. Khyta believe the Mariedians are inferior to them, and feel no guilt in what they do. We believe the future of the Mariedian lies in the soulborg, but we at least remember our roots, and respect the wishes of our Mariedian allies.”

“Allies?” Dan asked, glancing at the emblem on NT9’s shoulder, the same emblem which Darren had worn.

“Yes,” NT9 said. “Mariedians serve with us in our fight against Khyta.”

Dan sat up straighter. This was information had hadn’t expected.

“You fight Khyta? How? Who’s winning?”

NT9 looked at him, surprised. “Yes, we fight them. They are enslaving Mariedians; we weren’t about to sit by and do nothing. We frequently bomb their containment blocks, and free who we can. That’s about all we can do, though. Khyta’s resources and numbers are far better than our own. We can’t attack them head on; the best we can do is surprise them and flee before they know what happened. It’s an arms race, with Khyta’s better technology always beating our own. We survive, but only just.”

Too much information. Dan closed his eyes, trying to process it. He had no doubt that Darren had been part of these Senry Soulborgs, fighting the Khyta. At last, he knew what had been going on that night he was rescued. The Senry had bombed the prison block, blasted a hole in the ceiling, and Darren had come down to free as many Mariedians as he could. And if the constant thunderings and shakings and power outages were any indication, Senry was still hard at work bombing the prison cell. Or at least, they had been when Dan had left.

“I… actually meant to ask you something about that,” NT9 said. “About Khyta’s technology.”

Dan opened his eyes. What could he know?

“Every Mariedian we free mentions a ‘barrier’ of some sort, keeping them in their cell, but none of them can tell us what it is, or how it works. Such technology is something only the Khyta possess; Senry Soulborgs have never even seen one. Could you describe one to me?”

Describe one? Dan could do better than that. RR had told him exactly how it worked… if only he could remember. It had been years ago.

“RR – the Khyta who was there – explained it to me once, but I can’t remember… something to do with pulses?” Dan thought harder. “Wait!” Dan held up an arm. “My gloves! RR said they contained a replica of whatever made the Barrier!”

NT9 looked at his gloves. “Why?” he asked.

“I can’t remember… something about nerve damage, I think. I jumped at the Barrier when I was young and got stuck – RR said my arms were almost destroyed. She said they repaired them, and used a small replica of the Barrier to do… something. Something about nerves.”

“May I see your arms?” NT9 asked.

Dan held them out.

“A few Mariedians have had similar operations done – on a leg, one hand, one side – but they’ve always been pure metal replicas. This is different somehow… how did you get these scars?” He pointed to the faint red lines circling Dan’s arms, up from the gloves.

Dan remembered. He had gotten those scars when the power had gone out, and he had destroyed the service table trying to get free. That had been the day he had discovered what his gloves could do. He looked at NT9. Could he trust him? He was a soulborg after all, and the only proof Dan had that he was an ally was the emblem on his shoulder.

Dan thought about it. His gloves were the only weapon he had against the soulborgs, but they wouldn’t be very effective if they did as much damage to him as they did to them. What he really needed was knowledge; knowledge of how to use them, how to control them, how they worked. Maybe NT9 could provide that knowledge. It was a risk he would have to take.

Dan told him. He left nothing out, but told NT9 about the check, about the power going out, and how he had seen two devices touch inside his gloves, and what had happened.

NT9 considered his gloves for a moment. “I wonder,” he said, “might I see if I can open them up? See how they work? I might be able to tell you exactly what happened.”

Ever since that day, Dan had grown accustomed to thinking of his arms as machines, rather than part of his body. That was why he shrugged and sat back, laying his gloves flat on the table.

NT9 picked one glove up, and then the other. He looked at them from all angles. “Ah,” he said. “Knew it had to be somewhere.” With one finger, he pressed a small plate on the inside of Dan’s forearm. The glove promptly unfolded like a flower opening.

“What – How?” Dan wasn’t too worried by the fact that his arm was lying disassembled on the table; he was more curious about how NT9 had opened it. He himself had pressed on his gloves from every angle.

“Only a soulborg could do that,” NT9 said. “The plate can sense the exact amount of pressure I’m putting on it, and treats it like the code to a combination lock. Let’s see what we have…”

For a moment, Dan sat still while NT9 slid panels back and forth and moved wires in his arm. Dan pointed out the two devices he had seen touch when the blast came from his arm. NT9 looked at them carefully.

“Well,” he said eventually, “I won’t pretend to know what I’m looking at. Obviously, the Khyta have somehow developed a machine which can emit energy pulses at an unbelievable rate. This one,”— he tapped one device in Dan’s arm —“is the small replica of that machine. Without it, you wouldn’t be able to feel much of anything, aside from a constant dull pain in your arms. This one,” — he tapped a second device —“is an amplifier of some sort. It’s probably used to amplify the sensory input signals, so that you can feel better. Without it, your sense of touch would be minimal at best. But if those two devices were to touch… the pulse gets amplified instead. And with nowhere to go, it goes into a loop, passing through the amplifier again and again… until,”— NT9 lifted Dan’s arm, getting a better view —“until the expanding energy field hits the closest thing it can enter: the main shaft going down the arm. Most would flow into the hand and out through the palm or fingers, but a good portion would exit the back of the gloves and go into your upper arm. That’s undoubtedly what happened.”

“Right,” Dan said, struggling to understand what NT9 had said. There was a pause. “Can I do it again, without… you know, blowing myself up?”

NT9 considered the two devices. “Certainly. You would need an inhibitor in the shaft above the amplifier. That would send the energy back down the other way. There might still be some stray energy, but it shouldn’t do much more than cause some bruising. I can’t be certain, of course, but that would be my best guess.”

That was good enough for Dan. “Where can we get an inhibitor?” he asked.

“Easy,” NT9 replied, not even looking up. “The soulborgs have plenty of spare devices here in the Citadel, for repair. They won’t mind if I take two. And if I provide a connection between the amplifier and whatever device is creating those pulses, and tie it to an external trigger, you should be able to unleash an energy blast at will.”

“So you mean,” Dan said, “that if I wanted to I could replicate what I did to the service table? Without tearing up my arm?” This was better than he could have hoped.

“Yes, once I get the right materials,” NT9 said, pressing a few plates. Dan’s arm slid back together smoothly. “I wouldn’t recommend it unless you really need to though. There’s bound to be some damage to your arms above the gloves, even if it’s just bruises.”

A thought occurred to Dan. “Why did the Khyta give me these gloves? Don’t they know what they can do?”

“I doubt it,” NT9 said. “They would never give you such a powerful weapon if they knew. I suspect that not many Mariedians have gotten themselves stuck against the Barrier like you have. And of those who have, you are probably the only one who still wanted to get out. Plus, in their current state, the arms have got to be open, and you’d have to twist them quite a bit to get the blast you want. So it’s quite plausible that they don’t even know the capability is there, or at least they assume you couldn’t use it, which is perfectly true, since you could never open the gloves on your own. That being said… I wouldn’t use the gloves around any Khyta Soulborgs you might meet. If one of them sees it, they’ve all seen it. Then when you go back, they’ll know, and replace your gloves before you have a chance to use them.”

“How do I know which ones are the Khyta Soulborgs?” Dan asked.

“Simple,” NT9 said. “They’re on the enemy’s side. We call them Zettians. Dark armor, red eyes; you’ll know when you see one.”

Two days later, NT9 returned with several metal parts and devices. He installed an inhibitor in each glove to minimize the damage to Dan’s arms, and then created a trigger which would allow Dan to unleash a pulse of energy at will. Before he left, NT9 showed him how the trigger worked.

“There’s a safety,” he said, pointing out a small switch on the inside of each of Dan’s arms. “Pull that out and towards you, and your gloves will be armed. Pull it out and away from you, and they won’t fire. When armed, you simply put your hand out like you are pushing on something.”

Dan – first making sure the safety was on – tried it.

“A ninety degree angle,” NT9 said, correcting him. “Your arm should be straight out, and your hand straight up. The fingers should be as flat as you can make them. When in doubt, just make a motion like your shoving something away from you.”

“And the gloves will fire?”

NT9 nodded.

“What exactly can I do with them? I shattered that table back on Isadora…”

“It depends,” NT9 said. “It’s important to remember that you aren’t creating blasts of energy; you are creating pulses. A pulse acts like a wave: it spreads out from a central point. But when a pulse comes into contact with something solid – something which can’t bend and flex sufficiently to let the pulse pass through it – it’s going to behave differently. A pulse traveling through a solid object will begin to break down the forces holding it together. If you used your gloves on this stone wall, for instance, and used them long enough, the wall would eventually just crumble to dust. If instead you released a single pulse, it would be more like a shot from a soulborg’s rifle, although with a much wider area of effect.”

Dan couldn’t stop a grin from spreading across his face. When he returned to Isadora, the soulborgs would have no idea what was coming. It didn’t matter where they put him; he would always be able to escape. He’d tear down the walls and blast open the ceiling if he had to. He had to be careful, of course. He knew that once he used his secret weapon in front of them, he’d have to escape. He couldn’t afford to fail, otherwise they would undoubtedly rework his gloves so that his advantage was gone.

But he wouldn’t let that happen. When the time came, when the soulborgs least expected it, he would find Heleer, and together, they would escape.

Chapter Twenty – NT9

“Please—”

“No.” Heleer’s eyes, those same eyes which Dan felt he could peer into for hours, were now cold, locked against him. She had made a decision.

“Go,” she said.

“Heleer—”

“Go,” she repeated, motioning him away. “It’s over. I failed. You won. Go now.”

Dan could still see her face, and the hurt he was causing her. He understood now. She thought she had done the one thing she never could: shown someone how to be content with what they had. He had done more than prove her wrong. He had taken away the only victory she had ever fought for.

“Heleer, please,” he said. “I didn’t mean it. I’ll stay. I’ll be content. I’ll never try to escape again. Please, just… just don’t do this.”

She looked at him a moment longer, and then turned away.

“Please—”

“Go,” she said, her back facing him.

“Heleer.”

She didn’t answer.

“Heleer.”

Silence.

“Heleer!”

Dan sat bolt upright. He had shouted her name aloud. He closed his eyes, trying to rid them of the image of Heleer’s face. He had to fix this.

Dan opened his eyes again, and took in his surroundings. A stone room, a table and chair, single door, and a bed. He was still in SR. He was in the same room he had started in.

Dan didn’t hesitate, but got to his feet and made for the door. The only reason the soulborgs would keep him in SR this long was if they wanted him to do something. Well, he would do it, whatever it was. It was the only way out. After that, he would find Heleer, no matter what it took.

He had gotten half-way across the room when the door opened and someone stepped inside. It was the same soulborg who had spoken to Dan outside in the large hall. The one with Darren’s symbol. Dan stopped.

The soulborg closed the door behind him, and then stood there, watching Dan.

“You may call me NT9,” the soulborg said after a moment.

The same emblem Darren had worn was clearly visible on the soulborg’s shoulder. “Are you a friend?” Dan asked.

“Yes,” NT9 said.

“Then let me out.”

“You are not in SR.”

Dan said nothing. If he wasn’t in SR, then the soulborgs must have built this place, and why would they use stone and wood? Why not the same metal that they always used? And plus, if he wasn’t in SR, then the strange human-bird hybrids he had seen had to be real. No, he had to be in SR.

“Look around you,” NT9 said. “Nothing here could be simulated by a SR Unit. The detail is too exact. The construction too precise. The SR Unit can mimic, but it cannot create. All of this is real.”

“Including those bird-humans I saw?” Dan said, raising an eyebrow.

He expected a ‘no’, but NT9 nodded. “Including them, and they’re called kyrie.”

Dan said nothing. He still didn’t believe him.

“Consider what you can feel,” NT9 said. “Consider the stone beneath your feet. Could anything feel that way other than a surface outside SR? Have you felt anything which does feel like it belongs in SR?”

“It’s an upgrade then,” Dan said. “A more realistic SR.”

NT9 suppressed a laugh. “No,” he said. “I doubt SR could be made any better than it is now. This…  this is reality, and it’s something no soulborg will ever be able to mimic perfectly.”

Dan watched NT9 for a moment. “I don’t believe you,” he said. But even as he said it, the sense of fear he had felt before returned, stronger this time. Despite his best efforts, everything NT9 said made sense. Dan had seen nothing which belonged in SR, and encountered only things which belonged in the real world.

NT9 watched him. “I think you do believe me,” he said. “My processors can read Mariedians like a book, and you’re beginning to grasp the truth.”

Dan’s fear was growing steadily. “Where am I then?” he asked.

“You are not on Isadora,” NT9 said. “You are no longer a prisoner of the Khyta Soulborgs. You are on a different planet. You are on Valhalla.”

It took Dan a few days to finally come to terms with what NT9 had said. At first he stubbornly maintained that he was in SR. However, after two days had passed and nothing had changed, he found himself beginning to believe he really was no longer on Isadora. He at least wasn’t a prisoner of the soulborgs anymore. And if this was SR after all, then Dan could see no way out of it. All he could do was play along and wait for it to end.

Having decided that, he turned to the next most pressing thing: finding Heleer. If NT9 was right and this was some faraway planet, then Dan had to get back to Heleer as quickly as possible. The next time NT9 showed up, Dan asked him how he could do this.

“The only way you can go back,” NT9 said, “is by the same way you arrived. You were summoned here by Vydar, and only by his hand can you be returned.”

None of this had made an impression on Dan. “What?” he asked.

“Vydar is a Valkyrie,” NT9 said, “one of seven here on Valhalla. A Valkyrie is a being who has drunk from one of fifteen magical wellsprings scattered throughout this land. Upon drinking, they receive visions of creatures and people from different times and places. With practice, they can use the wellsprings to pull those people from their own times to here, Valhalla. We call the process summoning. Vydar is one such Valkyrie, and he has summoned you.”

Dan was silent for a moment. Only some of what NT9 had said made sense. “Why?” he asked.

“We’re at war,” NT9 said. “We have been for a long time. The other Valkyrie want the power of the wellsprings for themselves, and have been fighting amongst each other ever since they were discovered. And the abilities granted to them by the wellsprings means that they can summon armies to fight for them.”

“And that’s where I come in,” Dan guessed grimly.

NT9 nodded.

So that was it. Assuming this all wasn’t just an elaborate simulation, Dan was stuck on a distant planet, expected to fight in a war he cared nothing about.

“Why me?” he asked. “I’m no warrior.”

NT9 shrugged, the metal plates of his body sliding and flexing smoothly. “No one but Vydar himself can know the reason. He’s summoned more than warriors. He’s summoned people to build this very citadel we now sit in. He’s summoned healers and farmers. Not all are warriors. In time, your use will become apparent. Suffice it to say that all those who Vydar has summoned have proven their worth in some way. You will be no different.”

“Won’t I now?” Dan muttered under his breath. “So how do I get sent back?” he added so that NT9 could hear him.

“You will have to prove your worth. The same promise has been made to all who Vydar has summoned: serve him well and do your part to win this war, and when it’s over, Vydar will send you back.”

“When it’s over?” Dan repeated. “I can’t wait that long, NT9. I need to go back now. I need to—”

“Nothing will have changed.”

“I – What?”

“Nothing will have changed,” NT9 repeated. “When Vydar sends you back, you will go back to the same time and place he took you from. Your life will resume as if nothing had happened.”

Dan sat back in the chair. So he could go back and fix the damage he had caused. If NT9 was right, even the few days he had already spent here would never have happened for Heleer. If he was sent back.

“When?” he asked.

“When will the war be over?” NT9 said. “No one can be sure. The enemy has steadily been losing ground for some time; most believe the end of the war is near. But no one can be sure. You will be sent back when your duty to Vydar is fulfilled.”

Dan sat up straight. “Duty?” he echoed.

“Duty,” NT9 repeated. “He saved your life,” he added at Dan’s look. “I don’t know the specifics, but nearly every warrior Vydar has summoned would have been killed or injured if he had not intervened. Can you say this is not your case?”

Dan remembered RR pointing the small black object at him. He remembered her words: “beyond repair.” Had she been about to kill him? Dan hadn’t thought she would, but ‘beyond repair’ certainly sounded like it. Maybe Vydar had saved him.

NT9, reading his face, nodded. “You owe him a debt,” he said. “Repay that debt. Help Vydar win this war, and he will send you back.”

Dan slowly leaned back, thinking. It was too convenient to be a coincidence. This Vydar needed soldiers, and everyone he summoned happened to instantly owe him a great debt? How likely was that? Although Dan knew very little about him, he was beginning to dislike this Vydar. He sounded manipulative, like he didn’t care about the lives he summoned. He might have saved them, but only to throw them into a war they cared nothing for.

NT9 got up to leave. “You may not want to go back to your old life, you know,” he said, turning at the door. “Many don’t.”

“Why’s that?” asked Dan, still thinking.

“Once you’ve seen Valhalla, you’ll understand. For many, this land is a better place than the one they left. You might wish to stay.”

Dan thought about that. He was fairly certain that anywhere would be better than the cell he had lived in. But then he remembered Heleer, and a sudden feeling of longing washed over him. No place would be complete without her.

“Is Vydar the only way back?” he asked.

“Yes,” NT9 replied. “Only the Valkyrie can send people back. There is no other way.”

No other way. RR had once said something similar to Dan, about escaping his cell. Well, she had been wrong. Dan had gotten out, and he believed he could get out of this Valhalla too. Valkyrie or not, he would see Heleer again.

Chapter Nineteen – SR

Dan woke slowly. He felt as if he was being pulled from a very deep sleep, from a smothering dream in which the only thing he could see was a thick darkness. Slowly, awareness returned. Dan pulled himself from the last traces of unconsciousness, and opened his eyes.

SR Again. Dan’s heart sank. He was looking at a dark stone ceiling, with a faint light flickering on it, probably from a candle nearby. He didn’t need to see any more. He was back in his cell, locked in the SR Unit.

Or was he in his cell? Surely RR would have returned him to his home? But what if she hadn’t? What if she had sent him somewhere else, somewhere… somewhere without Heleer?

Heleer. He saw her face in a flash of memory: the disappointment, the hurt, the despair. He had to reach her, to fix the damage he had caused. He couldn’t wait for the SR to finish. He had to get out now.

“Let me out,” he said calmly, looking at the ceiling. Nothing happened. He hadn’t really expected it to, but he was far from giving up. “Let me out,” he repeated, keeping his voice calm and firm.

Silence was the only reply. After a minute, Dan looked harder at the ceiling. Something was wrong with it. It didn’t look right. It didn’t look like it belonged in the SR Unit. What was it? The detail? The shape? It looked more… realistic.

Dan shoved the thought to the back of his head. Maybe he was in a different, newer SR Unit. And if that was the case, then he was definitely not in his home. He had to find Heleer.

He swung his legs off of the bed he was lying on and sat up, facing the room he was in. It was stone, massive blocks making up the ceiling, floor, and walls. The was a single wooden door in the far wall, and a wooden table and chair in the middle of the room. On the table was a candle, its bright flame the only source of light. The only other piece of furniture was the bed on which Dan sat, the wooden frame holding a thin mattress of some sort, and a single rough blanket.

Dan took all of this in, noting as he did so that everything had the same level of detail as the stone ceiling. Nothing here looked like it belonged in SR. It was rougher, more detailed. The thin blanket which had been covering Dan fell away as he sat up, and glancing at it, he saw that it too was detailed beyond anything the SR Unit had ever created before. He held it up to his face, looking at it closely. He could see each individual thread, weaving its way through all the others. He could move them with his fingers. It was at that point that Dan realized something else.

Nothing felt right, either. Everything in the SR Unit felt soft, pliable. If Dan held a rock and squeezed it slowly, his fingers would create dents in it. The rock would feel hard, and it would take some time, but it could be done. Everything in the SR Unit was like that, not quite solid, from metal to water. Everything except the blanket Dan now held. And the bed he was sitting on. And the floor his feet rested on.

Dan dropped the blanket, stood, and crossed to the table. He looked at it for a moment, and then pressed both of his hands down on it. It didn’t budge. He pressed harder. It was as solid as… well, as the walls of Dan’s home.

Dan turned on the spot, taking in his surroundings once more. What kind of SR Unit was this? And why would RR put him here? Indeed, why would she put him in SR at all? Hadn’t she said he was ‘beyond repair’?

Dan had to find out what was going on. He had to get out of this SR, find Heleer, and then figure out what to do. He crossed the room to the door and tried to lift the latch. It was locked. It remained stubbornly in place, the metal feeling far too solid for the SR Dan knew.

Undeterred, he raised one metal arm, and smashed it down on the latch. Splinters of the surrounding wood shattered as the latch fell to the ground with a loud clang. Dan kicked it aside and shoved the door open.

A long stone hallway stretched to the right and left. It was narrow, but it reminded Dan a bit of the metal hallway outside his home. Torches lined one wall, spaced evenly like so many cameras. Opposite them were wooden doors identical to the one Dan had just opened. The similarities to the metal hallway sent a shiver down Dan’s spine. If he entered this hall as he had the other, would things end the same way?

Dan shook his head to rid it of his thoughts. The only thing which mattered right now was getting out and finding Heleer. Dan had spent years in the SR Unit, and knew there was no use in trying to find the interior wall and breaking out. Not only would he never feel it, he knew he could never break it. He had tried plenty of times when the power went down.

No, as much as he hated it, the only option was to play along with the soulborgs’ game, and find Heleer the moment the SR ended.

Dan set off down the hall. It was completely silent, the guttering of the torches and the echo of Dan’s bare feet the only sound. The hallway wasn’t long, and soon Dan came to a left turn, which he took. It led into another identical hall, except Dan could see that this one ended a distance away with a wide wooden door. The only other difference was that this hall was not empty.

Two men were halfway down the hall, leaning casually against the wall, looking at a piece of paper and talking quietly. Dan couldn’t make out what they were saying. He didn’t break his stride, but made straight for the door. They were nothing more than creations of SR.

The two men looked up as Dan walked past, taking in his simple clothes and bare feet. They exchanged confused looks, but said nothing. Dan glanced at them as he passed, and then paused. Their faces… they were detailed. Detailed like Heleer. Detailed like the faces Dan had seen behind the other Barriers when he had escaped. He had never seen faces like that in SR before.

He had to know what was going on. He forced himself to keep walking, and soon found himself before the wide door. Glancing back, he saw the two men still watching him. One of them looked like he was on the verge of calling out, but Dan gave him no chance. He shoved on the wide door, and it opened easily.

Light and sound flooded Dan.

Before him, stretching to either side, was a vast wide hall. The far wall was lined with windows set into the stone wall, and light was pouring from them, bathing the hallway with a bright, even light. And walking in the hall, moving past Dan without giving him so much as a glance, was a vast crowd of people.

Some were men. Some were women. And some were… different. Dan had seen many creatures in SR, some of which he supposed must be real. But he had never seen what he now saw, flying through the hall above the crowds.

They looked like humans, but had large feathery wings sprouting from their backs, with which they were flying like oversized birds, albeit gracefully, Dan had to admit. He watched them for a moment, wondering why the SR Unit had created them. No matter. They weren’t important.

Dan took a few steps forward, so that the people passing by were just an arm’s breadth away. They were all detailed like the two men Dan had seen in the hall. Nothing here looked like it usually did in SR.

Dan turned on the spot, taking in the detailed stone walls and high ceiling, the detailed faces rushing past him, and the strange flying human-bird hybrids flying past overhead. This was all wrong. SR had never been this detailed, this precise.

“Are you all right?” said a voice behind Dan.

Dan turned. One of the two men he had passed had followed him, and now stood in the doorway.

“Are you lost?”

Dan, used to treating people in SR like they were simply images dreamt up by a machine, ignored the man. He moved to the right, and started to feel the stone wall. It was solid. As solid as the walls of Dan’s home.

“What happened to your arms?” The man had taken a few steps towards Dan, and noticed his gloves.

Dan turned, confused. Until now, no one in SR had ever said anything about his gloves. They had accepted them just as if they were normal arms.

Dan glanced at the man, the stone, the wooden door, the people rushing past, and the light streaming through the window, and a slow sickly feeling began to creep into his stomach. This wasn’t right. None of it was.

“What’s going on here?” Dan breathed.

“What do you mean?” the man asked, coming closer. “It’s all right, nothing’s wrong.”

A hint of fear lodged in Dan’s chest. “This is all wrong. All of it. What’s happening?”

Two women paused as they were walking past, glancing at Dan. A younger man stopped as well, his expression curious.

“I want to get out,” Dan said, not speaking to any of them in particular. He had always assumed the soulborgs could hear every word he said in SR.

“Out?” one of the women repeated. “Out of what? The Citadel?”

Citadel? Dan ignored her.

“Let me out,” he repeated.

“He’s new,” one of the men said quietly. “Came from the hall.” He jerked his thumb towards the hall Dan had exited.

“What’s going on here?” a calm voice asked. Dan turned, and felt his breath catch and lodge somewhere in his stomach.

A soulborg stepped around the corner. Soulborgs had never appeared in SR. Ever.

This soulborg was quite different from RR. He spoke with a male voice, and his eyes, instead of yellow, glowed white. They were also uncovered, instead of behind a protective mask like RR’s eyes had always been. The sharp light of them made Dan blink.

The soulborg came to a halt in front of Dan. His body was different, composed entirely of plates of varying shades of gray. There was one other difference too: emblazoned clearly on the soulborg’s shoulder, was a symbol: a hexagon and two vertical bars.

It looked familiar, and after a moment Dan remembered: it was the same symbol Darren had worn. RR had once told him that was the symbol of an enemy. But Dan knew better now. He knew Darren had been his friend, and RR had been the enemy. And if this soulborg had the same symbol as Darren…

“I want to get out,” Dan said, speaking directly to the soulborg. “Let me out.”

The soulborg said nothing, but continued to watch Dan. The small crowd forming around them glanced from one to the other.

“Let me out,” Dan repeated, the sense of fear in his stomach growing. “Let me out. Take me to Heleer.” Still no reply. “Let me out!” he shouted, taking a step towards the soulborg.

“You are not in SR,” the soulborg said quietly.

All other sound ceased for Dan. He had eyes and ears only for the soulborg before him.

“You are not in SR,” the soulborg repeated.

Dan didn’t believe this for a second. “Yes, I am,” he said. “Now let me out.”

Again, the soulborg was silent.

Dan didn’t care if this soulborg was an ally or not. He had to get to Heleer, and he was willing to do anything to make that happen. He took another step towards the soulborg and raised a metal fist, preparing to do he wasn’t sure what.

“Wait!” the soulborg cried.

Dan didn’t wait, but a moment later he realized the soulborg hadn’t been speaking to him. Before he could bring his fist down against the soulborg, there was a rasping sound behind him, and Dan heard – and a moment later felt – a blast of something hot strike him in the back. He staggered forwards, trying to keep his balance, and then his mind shut off.

Completely. Totally. Unconsciousness covered Dan like a smothering blanket.

Chapter Eighteen – Beyond

Over the next few days, Dan’s guilt intensified. He hated that he was lying to Heleer. He hated more that she believed him, that he was actually deceiving her. And when the Barrier went back up as RR had said it would, Dan hated that he hadn’t taken the chance to get out when he had it. He could try to convince Heleer any time; opportunities to escape were rare, if they ever came at all.

Whenever Dan saw Heleer – in the mornings, when they ate, after SR – she would smile at him, and Dan would feel a stab of guilt. He knew that if he told her that he still wanted to escape, everything about her he had grown to need would be taken from him. He couldn’t let that happen. At the same time, if he continued with his lie, he soon wouldn’t be able to even look at her without feeling an overpowering sense of guilt. He couldn’t let that happen either. Dan couldn’t live like this. Something had to change.

Dan decided that the only thing he could do was escape, and force her to escape with him. She wouldn’t like it. She wouldn’t want to leave. But once she saw what was out there, once she knew just how limited she really was, she might agree that escape wasn’t such a bad idea. It would be a start if nothing else.

Normally this decision wouldn’t solve the current problem. Deciding to escape and having the opportunity to do so were two very different things. Or at least, usually they were.

Ever since the Barrier had dropped, the power had gone out several more times. Each time, Dan and Heleer had been trapped in the SR Unit, unable to do anything but wait for the power to go back on. But each time, Dan had seen that the Barrier had vanished for a few minutes. If the power kept going out, it would only be a matter of time until it happened when Dan was free to escape. He resolved that when the opportunity next presented itself, he would take Heleer, and they would go. They would find their way out.

Dan’s chance came a few days later. He was sitting at the metal slab which served as a table, waiting for Heleer to finish showering, when the floor shuddered slightly. Dan looked up. There had been several minor shakings throughout the past few days.

The lights clicked off, and then back on. That was a sure sign. Dan stood up, his body tense with excitement. The lights flickered. The walls trembled. And then the Barrier evaporated.

It was at this moment that Dan made a decision he regretted for a long time. His excitement overpowering his logic, he forgot about Heleer for a split second, and launched himself into the hall.

It was straight and narrow, with gray metal walls. Cameras dotted the walls every few spaces. The hall made a sharp turn some ways away at either end. That was all Dan could take in before a cry behind him brought him back to his senses.

Heleer was standing there, her hair wet, staring at him with an expression which made Dan’s late guilt seem like nothing more than a minor discomfort.

“Dan! What – What are you doing?” Her tone was blank of anything but shock.

Dan tried to think what to say, but he couldn’t find the words.

“You lied? This whole time, you lied?”

Dan knew the Barrier could come back on at any second. The lights had never gone out fully – a sure sign that the outage wouldn’t last. But he came back towards her, though he didn’t cross into his home. He had to convince her. He had to bring her with him.

“I had to,” he said. She needed to understand. “I did try to be content, Heleer. Really, I did. But it was no use. I have to get out. I have to. If you could just see what I saw, you would understand. You would want to get out too.”

Not much of this seemed to have gotten through to Heleer. She was still staring at him in shock and disbelief. “But you… I… I thought you were content,” she said blankly. “I thought you were happy.”

Dan took a step closer to her. He did not, however, step back into his home. He wouldn’t set foot there again if he could help it. “I was happy,” he said. “But the only reason I was content was because I knew I would escape one day. I could be patient because… every day felt like I was drawing closer to getting out.”

Dan could see what he was saying was hurting Heleer. After all, she was just realizing that he had been deceiving her for years, and that he had never really abandoned his hope of escape, even if he had tried all he could. But there was another emotion on her face which Dan found odd: fear. Why should she be afraid?

“Look,” Dan said, the pressure of the situation starting to get to him. “I wanted to tell you. I really wanted to tell you. But I just couldn’t.”

“Why not?” Heleer asked abruptly.

“Because you were happy!” Dan said without thinking. He glanced up and down the hall. Any moment, the Barrier would snap back on. He looked back at Heleer. “You were happy,” he repeated. “I didn’t want to take that from you.”

The fear in Heleer’s face seemed to be growing, mirroring Dan’s own rising tension. “I was happy,” she said, a quaver in her voice, “because I thought I had succeeded. I thought – I thought”— she drew a breath and continued on, as if forcing herself to say it all —“I thought I had stopped you from doing what I could never stop my mother from doing. Yes, Dan,” she said, a glint of panic in her eye, “I tried to stop her. Over and over I tried to keep her from leaving, to show her that she had all that she needed. But I never could. I didn’t try hard enough. She’s dead because I couldn’t convince her to stay. And you… you stayed. You did what she didn’t. I had convinced you. I had. And now… now you’ve proven me wrong.” She uttered the last words in a slow breath, as if she was just realizing what they meant.

There was a click, and a barely audible buzzing. Dan knew the sound by now. In a matter of seconds, the Barrier would come back on. They had to leave now.

“Come with me,” he said. “You’ve got to come with me.”

Heleer didn’t move.

It was Dan’s turn to feel panicked. He had to get Heleer out of there. She had to come with him. “Come on!” he said, half shouting, half pleading. She still didn’t move. Dan threw caution to the wind.

“Look,” he said, reaching out and grabbing her arm, though still not crossing into his home. “I can’t live without you. I need you,” he added, when she tried to pull away. “You’ve made me see things that I never would have before.”

Heleer succeeded in freeing herself, and took a step away from Dan. “Apparently I didn’t make you see enough,” she said. A change was coming over her. She seemed to be calming, closing off, her panic settling into resolve.

“Please—”

“No.” Heleer’s eyes, those same eyes which Dan felt he could peer into for hours, were now cold, locked against him. She had made a decision.

“Go,” she said.

“Heleer—”

“Go,” she repeated, motioning him away. “It’s over. I failed. You won. Go now.”

There were few things which could have convinced Dan to cross back into his home, but the need to bring Heleer back into his life was one of them. He had raised his foot to take a step forwards, but fate, it seemed, had other plans.

The Barrier snapped back on between them. Dan lowered his foot, unable to go further. Knowing now that she couldn’t come with him, he looked into her eyes, pleading, trying to convey through a look what his words couldn’t.

She held his gaze for a moment. Then she resolutely closed her eyes, and turned away. The simple motion felt like a blow to Dan’s stomach. He felt his throat tighten, and a red burning at his eyes. Heleer might have said he had won, but Dan knew better. He had just lost everything.

There was, however, nothing he could do about it. The Barrier was back up. Glancing behind him, Dan saw the camera pointed directly at him, watching him. He still had his gloves. He would get out. He would escape. But he would come back. He would come back to Heleer, and he would keep coming back until she left with him. Nothing would make him give up. With a last bitter look at Heleer’s back, Dan took off running down the hall.  

At first Dan didn’t see what he was passing. He simply followed the hall, turning left with it and running down a corridor, featureless except for the cameras spaced evenly apart on one wall. Each turned and followed him as he ran past. It was only when Dan came to a four-way intersection that he had to pause and figure out which way to go. Only then did he realize what made up the walls opposite the cameras.

They were Barriers. And behind each Barrier was a home, identical to the one Dan had just left. He quickly spotted the familiar bed, bathroom, and double SR Units in each one of them. They were all exactly the same. The only difference was the people.

Dan staggered back. Because of Heleer, Dan had known there must be other people, but he still wasn’t prepared to see them. Directly across from where he stood was a boy not much older than twelve, staring at him dumbfounded.

Dan glanced at the next home. Two adults, a man and a woman, had frozen in the middle of their meal, and were watching him with expressions of utter confusion. Dan returned their stare blankly. He glanced down the rest of the hall he had just run up. It was the same. One wall was cameras, the other was a Barrier followed by a home identical to Dan’s. Each held different occupants, all staring at Dan with varying levels of confusion. Dan looked down the three other halls branching off of the intersection. It was the same.

Dan now knew where he was, and what he was looking at. He was in a prison, and these homes… they were cells. Just as his had been. He took off running, not knowing where he was going. He had to get out of here.

He ran straight, streaking by more identical cells. Nothing ever changed. The gray walls remained the same, the cameras all turned and followed him, and the cells flashed by, each as identical as the last. Dan finally skidded to a halt next to one cell, unable to tear his eyes away from what he saw.

This cell was slightly different. It still took up the same space, but the SR Units were replaced with a single SR Cube, filling up almost the whole second floor. Dan stared at it, bewildered. Only briefly though. He was quickly distracted by the three children staring back at him from the first floor.

Three. Three children. Until now, Dan had always assumed the concept of siblings was something dreamt up by the SR Unit, but here he was, looking at two brothers and a sister. And behind them, seated at the table, were their mother and father. All were looking at him with confusion – and a hint of fear – in their eyes.

Dan’s eyes traveled between the family to the large SR Cube above them. Could they possibly all be meant to be in it at the same time? Could they possibly experience the SR together? What would that even be like?

The floor shook, tearing Dan from his thoughts. The lights flickered. Not giving the family a second glance, he took off again, speeding down the hall, choosing a turn randomly at the next intersection.

As he ran, Dan was beginning to realize that he was lost. The design of the prison he was in seemed fairly simple – it was just block after block of cells, arranged in orderly rows – but he had yet to find any hint of a way out. ‘I should have thought of that before I escaped,’ he thought to himself. But then again, what could he have done? It wasn’t as though there was a map anywhere.

Dan ran through several more intersections, until he finally came to a different one. Here, there were only three hallways; one to both the right and left, and the one Dan was in. While the hallways were exactly the same, the ceiling directly above the intersection was gone, leaving just a square hole. Looking up, Dan saw that where the ceiling should have been, there was instead a large shaft, going up, and up… and up… and up… Dan felt dizzy just looking at it.  He realized he was nowhere near the surface as he had been when Darren had broken him out. And then he saw something truly horrifying.

He could see that at regular intervals, the shaft branched into intersections identical to the one he now stood on. There was a whole other level on top of the one he was in. And another level on top of that. And another. It went on and on until Dan couldn’t see anymore. He looked down, his mind reeling. If each level was as extensive as the one he was in now, how large was the prison? How far down was he? How many people were in it? Dan couldn’t comprehend the number. And then a worse thought occurred to him: how would he get out?

There were no handholds on the wall. No ladder, stairs, or anything else to climb up with. He couldn’t get out that way. There had to be a door or something somewhere. If he could just find it… Dan turned on the spot, peering down each of the hallways in turn. There had to be a way out. There must be, if he could just—

“Hello, Dan.”

Dan had heard the phrase ‘blood run cold’ before, but only now did he know what it meant. He spun around quickly and staggered backwards, his hands quickly finding the solid wall behind him.

RR took a step towards him, her metal body glinting dully in the light of a thousand Barriers. “What are you doing here?” she asked calmly.

Dan couldn’t say anything.

“I know what you want,” RR said. “I know you want to get out. But you have to listen to me, Dan.”

“Why?” Now that Dan was over the initial shock, he was regaining his courage. Everything was out in the open now. He was either getting out, or he wasn’t. “Why do I have to listen to you?” he asked. “I know what you are, RR. You and the other soulborgs – they’ve imprisoned us. All of us.”

It was RR’s turn to be silent.

“How many are there, RR? How many just like me?”

“Fortunately, not many,” RR said, half to herself.

“Fortunately? Why is that fortunate? So that others won’t try to escape? So that they won’t see what you’ve done to them?”

“And what have we done, Dan?” RR asked, seizing on his words. “Hmm? Ask yourself, what have we really done?” She didn’t give him time to think about it. “You think you know the outside world because you caught a glimpse of it, but you know nothing of it. Your whole life you’ve had food to eat, clothes on your back, and a bed to sleep in. You take those things for granted because you know nothing else. But if you were to live out there in the real world, even for a day, you would realize those things aren’t given to you, Dan. You have to work for them. Hard. And most of the time, what you do isn’t enough. If you were out there for one day, you would starve, freeze, and have nowhere to lay your head as your body slowly shut down. You say we’ve imprisoned you, when what we’ve done is really helped you beyond your wildest dreams.”

Dan glared at her. “Then let me out,” he said evenly.

“What?”

“Let me out. If you think I would come running back to you after a day in the ‘real world,’ then let me out. Let me feel it for myself.”

RR didn’t speak.

“What are you afraid of, RR? If you’re right, then I’ll come back to you never wanting to escape again. You know that. Unless what you say isn’t true…”

“It’s true,” RR breathed. Her tone had changed, and somehow, some way, Dan knew she was speaking the truth. “Life beyond these walls is hardship. Maybe you would find a way to succeed, but even if you did, once you knew how hard it was, you would jump at the chance to have your every need met for you. You would jump at the chance to live a life without worry or care.”

Dan watched her, the yellow eyes refusing to blink under his gaze. “Maybe,” he said. “Maybe I would. Maybe I wouldn’t. I don’t know. And I don’t think you can know either.” He meant what he said too. He had seen only a glimpse of what was beyond the walls. RR could be right. Then again, she could also be wrong. “There’s only one thing I do know right now,” Dan said. “I want a life where I have to worry. I want that, because”— he thought back to Heleer —“a life without worry, without care… that’s no life at all.” He lifted his eyes and looked RR right in the face. “That’s just existence.”

RR watched him silently. Then she sighed. “You’re beyond repair, Dan,” she said. Then, before he could react, she lifted her arm. She held something small and black in her metallic hand, which she pointed at Dan.

Dan knew something was about to happen. He knew instinctively that he should duck. But there was no time. There was a flash of light, a moment where nothing seemed to happen, and then Dan’s mind clicked off.

Everything stopped.

Chapter Seventeen – Guilt

Dan was only truly out for a few seconds. When his awareness returned, all momentum had ceased. Beyond that, Dan knew very little. Every inch of him was overpowering his mind with pain, and his head felt hot and tight, like pressure was building up inside it, ready to burst out. He couldn’t move at all.

Dan dimly saw two feet approach him at a run. They were metal feet; soulborg feet. He was lifted up quickly. All was darkness. And then he was falling. Or no, he wasn’t. He was still. But he felt like he was falling.

Dan blacked out again.

A few seconds later he was back, his vision clearer this time. He was on his bed. The lights were off again. Dan blinked. Things started to come into focus. He tried to move his arms, but couldn’t.

Two figures appeared in his range of vision. One was RR. Dan recognized her instantly. The second was Heleer.

Heleer ran to him the moment she saw him, RR close behind. Dan tried to get up, but RR put a powerful hand on his chest. “Keep still,” she said, her voice calm and unhurried. “You’ve sustained multiple injuries. Moving will make them only worse. Do not touch his arms,” she added to Heleer in a sudden stern tone. Heleer withdrew her hand quickly. Curious, Dan looked down. He felt his stomach contract.

The arm he had twisted was ruptured. The metal glove was perfectly intact, but Dan’s upper arm was split in several places, blood rapidly sliding down the skin and splashing onto the already soaked bed. Dan looked further. A line ran down his body, just left of center. It was black, like a burn line. At least on the edges. The middle was pure white. It was also perfectly clean. The clothes had been blasted away in the line, and Dan could see white skin all along the line. Just white. There was no trace of red or even the faintest pink anywhere. The sight alarmed him. How could his skin be the wrong color?

The panel hiding the Shaft slid open and something came out. It was metal, but it wasn’t remotely humanoid. It quickly approached Dan on four wheels and came up on his right side.

“This is a robota, Dan,” RR said in her calm voice. “Lie still, and it will fix your injuries.”

Dan did as he was told. He was in too much pain to do anything else. The robota reached out a long arm, and Dan felt it pressing against his head. Then he felt nothing at all. All pain ceased. With horror, he saw other arms unreel from the robota and begin to explore his injuries without the slightest amount of pain. He could feel nothing.

Somehow, RR kept him from moving, panicked though he was. In the end, Dan lay back on the blood-soaked pillows, just waiting for it to be over. He saw Heleer watching him, and latched onto her light brown eyes, trying to draw some measure of calmness from her. This didn’t work. Probably because she looked as scared as he felt.

After what seemed like many hours to Dan, during which the ceiling lights flickered on and off sporadically, feeling began to return. At first Dan was sore. Then feeling returned to his arms, and he felt pain. It was much better though. He looked down and saw that all the injuries had been mended, long red lines the only sign left. The faint white line still ran the length of his body, but color was slowly beginning to return to it. Dan felt winded, as if he had been trying to climb a mountain all day. He could barely keep his head up.

Only when the robota had finished completely and returned to the Shaft, did RR speak again. “You’ll be fine now, Dan,” she said. She leaned towards Dan slightly. “Now tell me: what happened? How did you get out of the wall unit?”

Dan looked up at her. He had always had the impression that she knew everything. Was this some sort of trick question?

Dan was on the verge of explaining how something had connected inside his gloves, but just before he did, he happened to glance behind RR and saw the camera on the far wall. For the first time Dan could remember, it wasn’t watching him. It wasn’t watching anything at all.

The camera was pointed straight down, hanging limply from the wall. It was off. The camera was actually off. Of course. The power was still out. That’s why the lights had dimmed and the Barrier had dropped. Some of it seemed to be back on (the lights were working at the moment), but the camera… If Dan was right, RR had seen nothing. She really didn’t know what had happened. She didn’t know what his gloves could do. Dan glanced at the Shaft. She didn’t know that he had a way to get out.

Could he risk it? If he made something up to keep his gloves a secret, and RR already knew the truth, then she would know he was planning something. But if she didn’t know… Dan had to try.

“I’m not sure what happened,” Dan said, assuming what he hoped was a confused voice. “There was some sort of explosion at the table, and I was flung back. The Barrier came back on right on top of me, and the next thing I remember is waking up here.”

RR didn’t reply. She stood there watching him for several seconds. To Dan, it seemed like a long time. Too long.

“Very well,” she finally said. “You will have to stay in bed until you are fully healed.” Dan felt his newly healed muscles relax. “The SR Units are currently not operating, so both of you will stay here for the remainder of the day.” She turned and started to leave, but then paused and looked back at Dan. “The Barrier is down at the moment,” she said calmly, as if this were just another part of the schedule. “It will be back up shortly. Do not leave. If you leave, you will not be able to return when the Barrier comes back on.” She then turned and left through the Shaft.

The moment RR had mentioned it, Dan’s eyes had flicked to the Barrier. She was right; it was gone. There was no faint blue glimmer, no slight distortion in the air. He could see the outside hall clearly.

Even with the knowledge that his gloves could penetrate it, Dan had never seriously considered somehow escaping through the Barrier. He knew he would have to deactivate it somehow, and he didn’t have the slightest idea where to even start. But now, with the hallway so invitingly open before him, Dan was ready to leap out of his bed the moment RR left. He didn’t however. He forced himself to remain where he was.

Out of the corner of his eye, Dan could see Heleer watching him. He had promised he would never try to escape, but they both knew that such a desire didn’t disappear overnight. Dan also didn’t know if Heleer believed the promise he had made. She likely believed he had tried to forget about escaping, as indeed he had, but did she believe that he had really abandoned the idea completely? Dan doubted it, if the look she was giving him now said anything.

Dan knew only one thing for sure: he had made a promise, and he knew full well that if he broke it now, he would lose her forever. If he was ever to escape, he would have to convince her to come with him first.

So Dan sat there, resolutely not moving, even though every muscle was yearning to see what was in the hall.

After a moment of silence, Heleer sat down on the bed next to Dan. “Does it hurt?” she asked, nodding towards his arm.

Dan moved his fingers experimentally. It did hurt, but it definitely felt better than it had a few short minutes ago. He shrugged his shoulders (that hurt too, he realized). “Some,” he said.

“What happened?” Heleer asked.

Dan’s first instinct was to tell her all about his gloves, but he paused. The last thing he wanted to do was lie to her again, but was telling her what had happened the best idea? Without his gloves, he had no way to escape. He knew Heleer would never do anything to harm him… but she could easily tell RR about his gloves if she thought doing so would keep him here. Would she go that far? Dan glanced at her, wondering.

It wasn’t worth the risk.

“I’m not sure,” he said, opting to lie as little as possible. “There was some sort of blast. The table was destroyed. My gloves were too. I don’t really know what happened.” Technically it was all true.

Heleer looked at his reddened arms with sympathy. “Can I do anything?” she asked.

“I could use some water,” Dan said, realizing how thirsty he was. His mouth and throat were all dry.

Heleer got up and went to the bathroom. There was a dispenser of small paper cups next to the sink, and she came back a moment later holding one carefully in both hands. She didn’t give it to him though. She stood by the side of the bed for a moment, looking at him with an odd expression on her face.

“What?” Dan said.

Heleer handed him the water. “I doubted you,” she said, still looking at him with the same expression. “For a moment, when RR mentioned the Barrier, I thought you would run. But you didn’t.” She sat down on the side of the bed again and looked at him. “You stayed. Just like you promised you would.”

Dan wasn’t thirsty anymore. It had been hard enough lying to Heleer. It had been bad, knowing that she probably didn’t believe him. But now it was much worse. Now she did believe him, and though it made no sense to him, Dan felt guiltier than he ever had. He looked into her eyes, and knew he had to tell her. He had to tell her that despite his best efforts, he still meant to escape. He had to say it now, before she went further. But he couldn’t bring himself to say the words.

Heleer swung her legs up onto the bed so that she was sitting next to Dan, resting against the sparse pillows (the robota seemed to have cleaned them of Dan’s blood). “My mother would have left in a heartbeat,” she said. “I thought you were like her: impatient, obsessed, unchanging… But you’re not. You’ve changed. You’re different now, and… and I’m glad that you are.”

Not knowing what else to do, Dan drank his water. Beside him, Heleer leaned back against the pillows, a contented peacefulness on her face. Dan glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. He couldn’t say anything. He couldn’t bring himself to destroy that happiness.

Chapter Sixteen – Chance

Dan did try to forget about escaping. He really did. He tried to feel content with his life and with Heleer, and want for nothing, but he just couldn’t do it. The knowledge that there was something beyond the walls ate at him like acid. Every time he was in the SR Unit and felt sand, saw the sky, or breathed cold air, he remembered what it really felt like. Every time he saw Heleer, he knew there was a whole world out there which he knew nothing about. He couldn’t stand the thought. He felt like he belonged out there. More and more, the feeling that he was a prisoner, trapped in his own home, grew.

And yet he came to realize that he couldn’t leave. Not without Heleer, anyway. He might have lived alone before she came, but now the thought of doing so again made him, for lack of a better word, afraid. He was afraid of living without her, but he was more afraid of losing her altogether. And he knew that he would lose her instantly if he told her the truth. That was a price he couldn’t pay. He needed Heleer in his life. It was as simple – and as complicated – as that.

Still, there had been no chance to escape. In fact, for the longest time Dan hadn’t even heard the rumble overhead which he now knew was caused by the machine Darren had flown. He didn’t know what this could mean.

Even though he struggled with being content, there was no reason for anything to change. There was no way to get out, and as long as Dan kept his burning desire to escape under control, Heleer need never find out just how powerful it was.

Five years later, that all changed.

Ever since receiving his gloves, the SR Unit had routinely shut down in the middle of its cycle once every few months, and Dan had gone downstairs into the bedroom. Here, part of the wall would fold down into a narrow table, and Dan would place his hands and arms on this table. Several straps and latches would clamp down on the metal gloves, keeping them still while various scanners ran beneath them. Miniscule robotic arms would unlatch parts of the arm, checking to make sure everything was working properly. Sometimes parts would be replaced, or smaller plates would be switched out for larger ones as Dan grew. The whole process took about ten minutes, after which Dan returned to the SR Unit, and continued as if nothing had happened.

One day, Dan had one of these routine examinations. Blinking a bit in the light (it had been night in the SR Unit), he went down the stairs and over to the wall, where the clamps and straps latched onto his arms. Dan waited patiently while parts of his arms were unscrewed and adjusted.

And then everything changed.

Without warning, there was a violent shaking. Dan was thrown to one side, but his arms remained clamped firmly to the table. He got his feet under him just as the lights flickered briefly, and then died. Dan wondered what was going on. The power had gone out a few times before, always leaving Dan and Heleer stuck in the SR Units, but the shaking was new.

Dan heard a frantic banging upstairs. Heleer! When the power went out, the SR Units shut down, but the doors remained bolted shut. As the walls were transparent, Heleer could see outside… and see that Dan wasn’t in his unit. She knew about his gloves, but she didn’t know that he was bolted to the wall just below her. From what he could hear, she was banging on the wall of the SR Unit. He tried to call up to her, but he doubted very much she could hear him. Nothing got through the walls of the SR Units.

It was at this moment that Dan realized something else, something which made him briefly – very, very briefly – forget about Heleer. With the power down, the Barrier was gone. There was nothing preventing Dan from walking out into the hall. He could escape, here and now.

If he could get free. Dan instantly tugged on his gloves, but they wouldn’t budge. There must have been some extremely faint light coming from the ceiling, because Dan could make out the clamps holding him down. He looked closer. Maybe there was a switch or something he could press.

Half of his arms were dismantled, being held apart by small robotic arms, frozen in the middle of checking for problems. Dan could easily see the collection of boxes, circuits, and devices which made up his arm, but none of them offered a solution to get out. Heleer banged harder on the wall upstairs. Dan had to get to her, to let her know where he was. He also had to escape.

He pulled again. His arms were locked securely in place. Dan tried twisting. He was at least able to twist his arms back and forth some, but he stopped when he saw what they were doing. With most of their innards pulled out, the arms were flexing, bending together, folding. Dan didn’t like the look of that. He didn’t want to break them.

There was nothing for it, however. Dan could hear Heleer still hammering on the walls of her SR Unit. He knew she would be panicked, not knowing where he was or what had happened to him, and being unable to do anything about it. He had to get out. He looked at his arms for a moment, weighing the consequences.

It was no use. Heleer was more important. So he twisted, and twisted, and twist—

Just as two metal devices within his arms touched, there was an explosion such as Dan had never known. A shockwave slammed into him, wrenched his arms right away from the wall – leaving bits of them stuck in the clamps – and threw him the length of the room. At the same time, Dan saw the table he had been sitting at be destroyed. It was obliterated, as it literally blew into a thousand pieces, and then those pieces also shattered, spraying the floor and wall with tiny shards of metal.

Dan slammed against the floor a second later and finally skidded to a painful halt against the bathroom wall. Everything hurt. He couldn’t breathe. He felt as if he had been crushed – a sensation he had only felt once before, when he jumped at the Barrier.

Only one thing penetrated his mind: his gloves. He had seen the devices connect. That was what had caused the explosion. Dan didn’t care that he had nearly blown himself up. Only one thing occurred to him: He could get past the hatch. Between the shaking, the explosion, and being flung across the room, any thought of the Barrier had been driven from his mind.

His vision oddly blurred, Dan bent forwards, trying to see what in his gloves had caused the explosion. He saw several devices, but couldn’t tell which might have connected. He grabbed one arm and twisted it, further and further, trying to see what had happened. He had to be able to do it again.

Two small devices inside his glove touched. Dan saw them clearly. He also saw the blue spark leap between them, and the corresponding blast of energy surge through his glove and out through his palm. The shockwave flew across the room and smashed into the disintegrated table, smashing it into even smaller pieces.

Dan looked blankly at his glove. This was it. He could get out.

The lights clicked back on. With them came the Barrier. It was at this point that Dan realized he was sitting right where it usually was. It turned on with him in the middle of it.

For the most painful two seconds of his life, Dan felt like he was being torn apart. Then the Barrier seemed to make up its mind. Dan was flung back into his home and slammed against the wall with more force than he had thought possible. His mind went black before he even hit the floor.

Chapter Fifteen – Lie

Dan had grown to hate SR. It had started slowly, but over time it had grown, until Dan hated having to step into the SR Unit every day. He had always known that the soulborgs controlled it, but after Darren had come, he had slowly begun to realize just how much they used the SR Unit to control him.

He had begun to see how they subtly suggested things through the location, objects, or even people present. When he was focused on escaping, they had presented him with a series of horizons, only to show him a worse world beyond them than the one he had left. They had tried to show him perfect worlds with everything he wanted. They showed him obstacles which were impossible to overcome. But Dan had seen through it all eventually, and his anger at them and the machine they used had only grown.

These days he wasn’t always sure what the soulborgs were trying to do. Sometimes he could guess their motive, but usually he couldn’t tell. Occasionally he wouldn’t even be given a chance to think about it, as the soulborgs threw simulation after simulation at him. Today they had stepped up their game.

They were throwing buildings at him.

Dan had seen all manner of buildings in SR, from the simplest mud hut, to animal skins stretched across logs, to walls made of plaster, to wooden houses, to metal skyscrapers, to gigantic buildings made out of materials Dan could only guess at, and everything in between. He had seen them built, lived in, and destroyed. Today he was in a city of skyscrapers, abandoned, derelict, and windowless. They were dark. They were rusted.

And they were falling.

All around Dan, the skyscrapers were crumbling to the streets for no apparent reason, or suddenly swaying to a side to come crashing down, forcing him to dodge falling debris.

Dan knew he could never get injured in the SR Unit. He was fairly certain that being struck by falling bricks, sprayed by shards of glass, or knocked to the ground by gigantic metal girders would all be deadly, but the most that ever happened was bruising.

Not to say that the bruises weren’t painful. Dan felt it when he wasn’t fast enough, and the side of a building fell on him. His skin never broke, but he felt the impact, and the jarring blow to his bones. He felt a thousand pinpricks of pain on his skin as glass shattered around him, even though there was never a single drop of blood.

That was why he ran, dodging the falling buildings as best he could, even though he knew there would be no lasting injuries. That was also why he was protecting his head with his metal gloves, and why they were the first to receive the blow when a metal support detached itself from a nearby building, and fell on top of him.

Dan was thrown to his knees by the impact, but the metal support bounced off of his gloves, and fell to the side. Dan’s arms felt jarred, but there was no new bruising. There was no effect at all. The gloves were completely unaffected. He knew they were actually his arms, and not gloves at all, but he had never stopped calling them that.

Similar things had happened before, where Dan used his gloves to block things. But for some reason, with buildings falling and crashing all about him, and thunderous explosions of glass and metal deafening his ears, something clicked in Dan’s head. He suddenly realized what he could do. Not just in SR; he had used his gloves plenty there. But what Dan had never realized, was how he could use them outside of SR.

If his gloves could absorb a blow like they just had, how powerful were they? Powerful enough to pull away the panel hiding the Shaft? Or for that matter, could they get the hatch in the back of the Shaft open? Dan wondered how he could do that; Heleer had said it was bolted shut. He looked at his gloves, temporarily forgetting about the rubble falling about him. Could he just… punch through it?

Why not?

Dan surged to his feet, deflecting another oncoming girder with his gloves. The metal fell to the street with a clang. Dodging a tumbling wall, Dan ran to the nearest still-standing building, drew back his fist, and punched the wall.

It hurt. A lot. Even though his whole hand was technically metal, he still felt the impact, and the corresponding pain in his metal knuckles and fingers. For a moment he thought he might have broken them.

But his glove also punched straight through the cement wall. Dan’s elation was somewhat dulled by the intense throbbing pain in his hand. It grew and grew, causing the muscles in his arm to tighten unbearably.

Unable to stand with the pain surging from his arm, Dan dropped to his knees, and then to the ground, cradling his burning arm. The pain overpowered his mind for a brief moment, and unable to contain it, he let out a single, terrible, uncontrolled cry.

Then the pain began to recede. It was slow, but it was infinitely better than it had been. One by one, the muscles in Dan’s arm relaxed, though the fingers of the glove remained stiff and sensitive. Dan struggled to his feet, still holding his arm carefully. Every time he moved it, sharp stabs of pain shot up it, so he tried to keep it as still as possible.

He glanced at the wall. A hole went cleanly through it, and he could clearly see that the wall was nearly as thick as his head. He smiled to himself despite the pain. If he could do that, what else could he do?

By the time the SR Unit finally shut off and the door unlocked, Dan was sore, beaten, and his entire right arm was stiff and painful. But he was excited. He couldn’t wait to see what his other arm could do.

While Heleer showered, Dan sat at the table, looking at his gloves. While he had been showering, he had been wondering how his gloves could help him escape. Could they punch right through the Hatch? Or go through the Barrier?

Dan glanced at the Barrier. Why not? It was worth a try.

Cautiously, remembering all too vividly the last time he had touched the Barrier, he put out his hand until the palm was mere inches from the invisible field. He felt nothing. He remembered last time feeling static all up and down his arm. Maybe they could go through the Barrier!

Confidence growing, Dan placed his entire palm on the Barrier. Absolutely nothing happened. Dan watched his hand for a moment, and then a grin slowly spread across his face. Nothing was happening. For some reason, the Barrier couldn’t push the gloves back.

Excited now, Dan pushed the glove further. He started to feel resistance, but it began to slide through the Barrier. Dan could see the blue outline of it where his glove entered it. And then he saw something else. He saw another blue outline, just beyond the first. His glove was beyond the Barrier. It was in the hall.

All sound and time seemed to dim for Dan. He just stared at his glove, not quite believing what he was seeing. He pushed his arm further, almost to the elbow, but the moment the skin above the glove touched the Barrier, he could go no further. His gloves might be able to get past the Barrier, but the rest of him still couldn’t.

Then the questions began to arrive: How could his gloves help him get through the Barrier? Dan had never even considered getting out through the Barrier before, but now it was suddenly a possibility.

Something, some unknown sense, made Dan look behind him. He had been so focused on the Barrier that he hadn’t heard the water turn off, or Heleer come up. She was standing just inside the bathroom now, wet hair falling about her head, staring at him blankly. While nothing but shock registered on her face, Dan knew what she was thinking. He felt a horrible sinking sensation, and quickly pulled his glove from the Barrier. It slid back easily.

Heleer said nothing. She continued to look at him with surprise, but after a moment, she walked to the table and sat down. Then she just looked at him. It wasn’t as if her face was impossible to read. There was just nothing there.

After a moment, Dan couldn’t take anymore. Someone needed to say something. “Heleer,” he said, “I—”

“Did you mean what you said last night?”

“I – What?”

“Last night,” Heleer repeated. “You promised me something. Did you mean it, or are you planning on leaving me?”

Dan knew there was only one answer he could give. He tried to soften the blow as much as he could. “I’ll never leave you,” he said. “When I escape, I’ll take you with me.”

Heleer didn’t even blink. “You know what I meant. Don’t you?”

Dan nodded, not able to meet her gaze.

Heleer reached out and lifted Dan’s chin, forcing him to look her in the eyes. The motion wasn’t lost on Dan; she knew he was still curious about them.

“Lying is wrong, Dan,” Heleer said. “When you deceive someone, it means you can’t be trusted. Do you understand?”

It was actually fairly normal for Heleer to tell Dan what was right and wrong. Growing up alone, with only a simulation as a source of information, Dan had very little idea of morals at all, besides what his conscience told him.

Dan nodded.

“Promise me again,” Heleer said. “Can you be content with everything we have, or will you continue to want to get out?”  

Dan wanted dearly to say he would always be content, but he couldn’t. He paused. Heleer closed her eyes, so that Dan could no longer see them. The message was clear: Dan could escape, or he could have this life, this place… and her.

Dan looked down. He couldn’t give up either. He glanced up at her. Her eyes were open again, and she was watching him, waiting for his reply. How could she trust him if he lied again? But how could he keep her if he told her the truth? He knew she would still be there, but the smiles, the laughter, the joy… that would be gone. She would be gone. He couldn’t take either consequence.

As much as Dan hated to do it, he knew there was only one way out. He would have to lie again. He couldn’t give up on reaching the horizon, and he couldn’t give up Heleer to reach it. There was no other way.

“I promise,” he said, fully aware that he was doing exactly what she had just told him not to do. “I’ll stop trying to escape. I’ll be content.”

Dan wasn’t sure if Heleer believed him. If he was reading her right, she wasn’t sure about it herself. She must have decided to accept it, however, because when the food arrived, she picked up her brown cube and began eating silently.

Dan followed suit. In a dark part of his mind, he knew he had just dug himself in deeper. He would work it out. Eventually. But for now… he couldn’t risk losing Heleer.

Chapter Fourteen – Promise

Dan was patient for what he would later know was six years. At first it was hard. He would find himself staring at the Barrier or the Shaft, or watching the lights on the far wall whenever they appeared. But he forced himself to think about something else. With nothing else worth thinking about, his thoughts often turned to Heleer as a result.

He had grown to appreciate the patience she had taught him. And she had taught him, with great zeal. She had started focusing his mind on the things he had, and had shown him how to be content with the way something was, instead of thinking about how it could be better. It had taken time, but Dan had slowly come around to her way of thinking. He was content. He really was.

And yet, the desire to escape remained. Dan still wanted to get out. He still wanted to see the true sky, feel the vastness of it, and look into its depths. The idea still scared him some, but he found that he liked the feeling. It was the unknown. He felt drawn to it.

But he knew that he couldn’t reach it, not yet. And so he continued with the schedule, each step of it feeling like just another step closer to finally escaping. Whenever he stepped out of the SR Unit, Dan felt content, knowing both that his life here with Heleer was fine, but also that he was merely biding his time until he could escape.  

True to what he had said, though, Dan was not obsessed. In fact, the one thing he paid the most attention to was Heleer. He had long ago realized that without the patience she had given him, he would have given up (ironically what she wanted in the first place).

He had realized that she had no reason to stop him from escaping. She had only said something because she didn’t want him to meet the same fate as her mother, and for that, Dan was grateful. He never forgot what she had done for him, even if she herself didn’t know the full extent of it.

Most of the time, though, these thoughts lay at the back of Dan’s mind, collecting dust. After six years, only two thoughts remained at the forefront: escape, and contentment. This meant that while Dan was content with what he had, he saw it all as temporary. When the opportunity presented itself, everything would change. This was why he never really relaxed, never really simply sat back and admired something for what it was. One day, that changed.

He had spent the entire day trying to survive in the bleakest landscape the SR Unit had ever conjured up. The ground had been dry and parched, the faintest wind had picked up dust and sand and blown it in his face, water had been non-existent, and the sun had scorched his skin until he thought he was burning up. He wasn’t sure what the soulborgs had been trying to do, and neither did he care. He was simply grateful to be out of the SR Unit, and standing under the refreshingly wet stream of warm water coming from the shower.

For what Dan knew was far too long, he just stood there, soaking up the wetness of the water. He felt like he could stand there forever, with his eyes closed, feeling the overpowering heat leech out of his body and down through the drain. At first it had been hard to be content with everything, but right then, right now… Dan wanted nothing more.

After his shower, Dan sat down to the same meal he had eaten all his life. He didn’t care though. He didn’t care that it was the same gray lump he had seen every third day. To him, it was the most welcome sight there could be. He chewed it slowly, savoring its non-existent flavor, simply happy to have it.

A flicker of light caught Dan’s eye. The light was back, dancing on the far wall. He stopped chewing for a moment, watching it, the old flare of excitement leaping up within his chest. But it was weak. The familiar burning desire to escape was no longer a raging inferno, but a smoldering remain.

Dan glanced across the table to where Heleer sat, eating and unaware of what he had seen. As he watched her, he felt for the first time that if the Barrier were to drop right then and there, and he could just walk out, he wouldn’t. He would stay. And why not? Why put an end to all this?

Dan resumed eating, the desire to escape still smoldering within him, unwilling to go out completely. He did still want to escape. There was no denying it. He wanted to know what was beyond the walls which had surrounded him all his life. He wanted to know what was out there, waiting to be discovered.

Heleer paused her eating to drink some water. The motion made Dan look up. She had changed since she had arrived in the Shaft. She had grown, though Dan was still taller than she was. The shade of her skin had lightened slightly since Dan had met her, though its exact color defied all labels. It was just an imperceptible shade darker than Dan’s fair skin. What Dan loved the most about her though, was her hair.

He had never lost his fascination with it. It had grown thicker, cascading down from her head in light brown waves, resting gently on her shoulders in soft folds. He still found the memory of its feel a thing of curiosity. The texture was something nothing – not even the SR Unit – could duplicate.

Dan watched her silently for a moment. Heleer had come from beyond the walls. Once, she had been one of the unknown things which Dan had so dearly wanted to discover. Well, she was here. His wish had been granted. Wasn’t it enough?

The table began to retract into the wall, pulling the trays with it. Dan grabbed the last bit of food and got up, automatically folding his chair and putting it back in the wall. Then he stepped aside to make room for Heleer as she stowed her chair as well.

Dan observed how automatic his response had been. The schedule had been a part of his life as long as he could remember. There had once been a time when he had resented that. He remembered how that had ended: his metal gloves kept the memory fresh.

Still, he longed for freedom. He longed for no walls, no barriers, no schedule telling him what to do and when to do it. He longed for freedom, and yet… he didn’t. He remembered how it had been when he had rejected the schedule, and sat alone in silence for hours. He had never realized it before, but he was grateful for the schedule. He might want freedom… but he no longer resented the schedule as he once had.

The light over the stairs went out, leaving only the ceiling in the bedroom lit. Dan crawled into the bed first, sinking into the soft mattress. He tried to let his tense muscles relax. Heleer crawled in after him, and lay down next to him. They usually slept well apart, but when she was particularly happy or content, she liked to lie next to him. Dan didn’t object. His arm found its way around her, and they both lay there, silent and comfortable, waiting for the lights to go out.

Heleer sighed. “My bed never used to be this soft,” she said. She had told Dan this before. From what he had gathered, she had used to live in a home identical to his, except that she had slept in a separate bed. “It was too hard for me,” she said. “I used to like to crawl into the big bed with my father. He’d always let me.”

Dan said nothing, his silence inviting her to go on. She rarely talked about her parents.

Heleer didn’t continue, however. She lay there, her head on Dan’s shoulder, idly watching the camera in the far hall.

After a moment she spoke quietly, without moving her head. “I’m glad you listen to me, Dan,” she said. “No one ever listened to me like you do.”

“Didn’t you say your father did, once?” Dan asked.

“I could talk to him,” said Heleer, “but he didn’t listen. Not really. I actually don’t know if he ever even heard me.”

“Why not?”

Heleer was quiet for a moment. “I don’t know what happened to him, exactly,” she said at last. “Mother never told me, and he rarely said anything to me at all. It was like he was trying to distance himself from us, both me and my mother. I would talk, and he would listen, but he never replied. He never said more than a few words.”

“What about your mother?” Dan asked softly. He asked softly because he knew that Heleer still didn’t like talking about her.

“She spoke to me,” Heleer said, still not moving her head. “But she was always… obsessed. In the end, the conversation always returned to that.”

Dan felt a twinge of the old excitement. “Why though?” he asked. “Why did she want to escape?”

Heleer said nothing, and for a moment Dan was afraid he had gone too far. But then she spoke.

“She told me once she had seen the outside world. She never told me how, though. I was interested in the idea at first. I wanted to see it for myself. But when I saw how focused on it she was, how she couldn’t see anything but it… I knew I never wanted to see it. Not if that was the price.”

The lights clicked off, and Heleer snuggled deeper into the bed, shifting to her side and putting her head more comfortably against Dan. Dan was glad the lights had gone out when they did, for he had felt a rush of the old excitement when Heleer talked about her mother. So she had seen the outside world too. If only he knew how…

“I’m glad you’re not like my mother, Dan” Heleer murmured. “I’m glad you can see what’s around you, and I’m glad you’re content.”

Dan moved his legs deeper into the bed and pulled the covers up to his shoulders. Heleer lifted her head for a moment so he could move down, and then let it rest once more against his shoulder.

After a moment, she asked him something, so softly that Dan almost didn’t hear it. “Promise me something, Dan. Promise me… promise me that you’ll never leave me. Never leave me, like my mother did.”

Dan knew perfectly well what she was asking. In the darkness, he glanced at the Shaft, but he kept his arm around Heleer. He looked at the Shaft for a long time. He meant to escape. Nothing could change that. But he looked back at Heleer, her head on his shoulder, and he knew that being patient wasn’t all that hard.

“I’ll never leave you,” he said. “Never.” She snuggled closer to him in reply.

You know what she was asking, said a voice in Dan’s head. It was his mother. She always seemed to warn him when he was doing something he knew he shouldn’t. You know what that promise meant to her. You should have told her the truth. You should have said you still mean to escape.

But Dan didn’t want to listen to his mother. He knew that if he told Heleer the truth, all of this – his glance took in his home, and Heleer, now sleeping next to him – would be thrown into disarray. It would be a mess; one Dan didn’t want to have to deal with. No. No, the simplest solution was just to say he would stay.

He half believed it anyway. What harm could there be?

The SR Unit

Right click the image and view in new tab to see it full size. © T. A. Myron 2019

The SR Unit. The creation which allows the soulborgs to manipulate what their captive Mariedians feel, see, and perceive, every day of their lives. Many a captured resistance fighter has lost their mind in the SR Unit, unable to tell simulation from reality…